“Seek out that particular mental attribute which makes you feel most deeply and vitally alive, along with which comes the inner voice which says, 'This is the real me,' and when you have found that attitude, follow it.” William James
It would seem to be the most natural and simplest of tasks to know ourselves and to be ourselves. After all who knows you better than you, and who is better equipped to show your true face to the world than you are? The virtue of being true to ourselves has been extolled by every great philosopher, sage, and enlightened master. Jesus referenced our tendency to keep our essence hidden and invited us to let our light shine for all the world to see. Buddha in his parting words to his disciples counseled, “Be lamps unto yourselves; be your own confidence. Hold to the truth within yourselves as the only truth.” Perhaps most famous of all is the line from Shakespeare, to thine own self be true.
So if being ourselves is so natural, and ancient wisdom confirms its virtue and value, why is it so difficult to carry out? It seems to me that we all suffer from varying degrees of identity crisis, or more aptly identity amnesia. I think most of us learned to be inauthentic as an adaptive response to life. Like auditions for the play of our life, we discovered how we acted determined whether we were accepted on the world stage. It may not have seemed entirely up to us whether we could just be ourselves. The rewards of authentic expression may have been overshadowed by the risks of being real in the presence of others. So we chose the safer role back then, at the cost of our true self-expression. But that was then, and we no longer need to believe what is no longer true for us. If we are still hiding our light and betraying our true self-expression, we are denying our own freedom, and missing out on the greatest joy in life.
Sometimes life has a way of breaking us open to authenticity, sometimes through breaking us down, and we discover as Anaïs Nin observed, “the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” My spiritual life has been an unlayering process, in that my joy in living has been directly proportional to my ability to shed the masks and old skins of who I thought I should be in the world. Our existence is validated and appreciated best by showing up as we truly are, not by our ability to conform. It is your and my uniqueness that is our special gift that brings value to the world and joy to us in its expression.
Each of us has a song to sing, a dance to dance and nobody can do it quite like we do. Let’s give ourselves permission to get back on the stage of life and play the part of our true self, sans masks, disguises, and make-up. No longer seeking to appease the critics but only to honor the Self that you are. It’s the role of a lifetime that you’ve (we’ve) been waiting for…and it has success written all over it.
Here's to you!
Larry
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